After one month, I have to swallow the bitter pill. It doesn't work.

In fact, my skin develops more pimples, itches more, and appears redder after applying the lotion. Yeah, another bucks being burnt.

I remember last weekend I broke down and cried after seeing how red my face has become now. As if looking like a tomato is not enough, there are plenty of tiny pimples (if I must call 'em so, since they are only pin-point sized and often filled with clear/ whitish fluid). I guess it was my very first time crying for my ruined face. I was beyond furious thinking about how much money I had spent on trying to fix my skin and how much pain and silent insult/ pity I had faced every day. To make it worse, I still have to go to work every day with this kind of face seeing people looking at me with pity in their eyes.

Sigh.

I started to feel tired after 3.5 years.

I never gave up looking for remedy to my skin problem, yet everything that seemed to work at first failed miserably and led to new problems.

Later I will tell you full story about my face, right now still too sad :(

I decided to stop using the gel my derm had prescribed me since November last year. I used it every night for about two months without knowing it contained steroid (what steroid precisely I never knew). My derm also never told me, and I only found out from a local forum where some fellow patients were discussing about the clinic's medication and someone pointed out that gel contained steroid and was only meant for short use.
Well, my derm did warn me that I could not use this gel every day and I must learn to taper the usage. She tried to prescribe me with other gel for these pimples but every medication only burned my skin and made it even redder.
June 15th, I underwent a v-beam session and she still had no idea what was happening with my face, thus she kept prescribing me the steroid gel. She told me to use it only when my skin flared up, but of course, it wouldn't work. I've tried to taper the usage, apply it only every other day, then every two days, but my face went even crazier.

So many friends recommended me to try seeing some other dermatologists, but honestly I have lost my faith in them. I think they'll just end up giving me similar medication and I will still end up with red, sore, and pimplish face.

When I found ITSAN website, I found my confidence again. I think, this is what happening to me. Of course this is not a diagnosis, but I experience very similar (if not identical) condition with those patients there. I am glad I'm not the only one (because here, I seem to be the only one around with such red cheeks. I know, what a sight...) I might be experiencing these symptoms from steroid withdrawal!

This encouraged me to just stop using the steroid gel COLD TURKEY!

June 11th was the last time I used the gel (after v-beam session). Days after that I only use fash wash in morning and night.

You know what would happen when you suddenly stop the steroid after your skin becomes addicted to it?

First four days were still fine, but after that.... HELL.

All red, full covered with tiny pimples, it hurt and was very itchy. On Sunday I had to skip church because my cheeks were burning red and every time I looked at mirror, it seemed that one tiny pimple appeared.

Frustrating, I know.

I couldn't use my face wash. I used cold shower close to my face to cool down my face, pat dry, and some tiny bumps popped off. Several minutes later they became crust and looked less inflamed. But there were many many pimples there and it kept appearing till the rest of the day.


It went on like that but I noticed with less severe degree.

I can also see that what's yesterday a pimple, it dries up and turns flaky the next day. Surprisingly, even though my skin feels rough and dry, it itches less! The only itchy part is the red area with new pimples erupting. Other than that, quite comfortable.. *finger cross.